My Life of Crime

Wednesday was guild meeting.  October is our month to change jobs and turn the guild officially over to the new board.  However, the past president was going to be out of town.  She had asked me to open the meeting and to help out the new president by helping her close the building after the meeting.  The place where we meet closes before we even arrive, so we are responsible for locking everything up.

See?  I was trying to be nice and helpful.

When I got to the meeting the new president had the building open and the lights on and everything looked great.  She went over the agenda with me and asked me to sit up front with them just in case.  Not a problem.  

Then came the problem.  How did she hook up the microphone?  Standard microphones come with "male" connectors on the end.  Oddly, this building was built with a "male" connector in the wall.  So, we have to use the centers adaptor to get our microphone to work.  The center keeps this in the office entry in a desk drawer.  The entry area is always kept open for us (and other groups that meet there) and it's no big deal to run and get it.  I told her I'd show her where it was in the office.  

The door was locked.

Locked!  The door is never locked.  We aren't given a key for that door.  Shoot.  No way could we have a meeting without a microphone.  For whatever reason the hard of hearing always sit in the back and even with a working mic will often yell at people "we can't hear you!" and "speak up"

There was an unfamiliar lady who had been lowering the projector screen.  Maybe she worked there?

Nope.  She was with the orchid society and I'm still not sure why she was there lowering the screen when any of us could have flicked the switch but there she was.  She insisted that the office door is always unlocked and even tried it herself in case we just were unable to work a doorknob.  She thought she had seen the chair set up man around so we went looking for him but the man she saw was actually a guest at the meeting.

What to do, what to do?

Then I remembered that a certain member had a bit of experience with breaking in entering  the locked office.  After a bit of hunting, we found her and she told us how she had been successful in the past.

A certain window screen is merely duct taped in place over a window that is apparently never locked.  Sure enough we were able to move the screen, open the window and in no time at all I was hauling my backside through the window and standing on the work surface.  I hopped down onto the floor only to discover that the dutch door between the office and the entry area was locked.  I hoisted myself over that (and am proud to say I did not end up lying on the floor) and opened the door for my partners in crime friends who were generously volunteering their time for the quilt guild.

In the end, we had the microphone, the window was closed and the screen restored to its proper duct taped spot and all was right in the world.

I just hope I didn't leave a shoe print on the desk.

-- marcella